yeah I've felt the pain of losing someone I really cared for

yeah I've watched them walk away from my life counting the steps they take

but I have never felt like this

the way I felt when you broke my heart

so empty so cold

just two nights ago

I can't say I stood there with my heart on one hand

no, you had it crushed in yours

I cried myself to sleep that night

my last thought was

"boy, I need a hug right now"

next morning my little brother

who is not a fan of waking up early

got up from his bed, half asleep

and hugged my legs

then he marched into his bed and kept sleeping

until mama woke him up

he is going to be a great man

his hug started to heal my broken heart...!♥

love...always...

hope!

finally hOme..♥

Sitting at home right now. This place don’t really feel like home to me, but you oh wow you. You feel like home to me, filled with hopes and dreams, love and softness.

I have been searching for a place where I can be myself, where there is always the beauty of a rainy day and a warm blanket on a cold night, yeah I have been looking for that place filled with life and happiness.

That place is you, oh beautiful you, with your dreams and your nightmares, with your smile and your happiness, with your attitude and your light.

You don’t back down when things don’t work out. I love ♥ the way you dance through life, leaving all your cares behind, putting your hands up in the air. These moments of craziness we share, you know exactly what to say to make me smile, you know exactly where I draw the line. You know what pisses me off, you are never out of second chances. You know I would go to the end of the world to find all the things that you need.

There are just a million reasons why I like to call you my best friend.

I know I said I thought this stupid communal world had catch you but I was wrong.

Because when all is said and done, everything’s wrong and I run to you, I’m finally home.

I’m Finally Home♥

love...always..

hope..!♥

Its Hard to Sleep Without the Moon

what is it with me lately?
I can't read, I can't think, even dreaming has become hard.
what happens after it is all said and done?
where do I go from here?
Once upon a time my life was a fairy tale, but then everything started falling apart.
Then you came along with you wise words and that insipiring smile of yours.
You gave me a hand and pulled me out of the hole I was stuck in
but.. Now what?
You are gone and I have no idea where to go from here
I've been so confused it's actually kind of weird
It cannot be that hard, letting you go is making me feel so cold
You are no longer near, so it should be easy
I'm gonna miss you, that's just a truth I can't deny
But in time it will get better, you'll just become a distant memory
And in years from now I'll beging to think you where nothing but a dream
Ok the truth is, I'm lying.
I'll never be able to forget you
all those lessons that you taught me
and all those moments I'll never forget
the time that you talked to me so honestly, tears filled your eyes
but I guess it's fine
I'll bealive all your lies if it means I'll be able to sleep at night
faking a smile every day
and crying every sleepless night
I'll just talk to the moon as if it where you
I know, well I hope wherever you are
you'll be listening

love always

hope!♥

In The Loneliness of my Nightmares

In the loneliness of my nightmares

I see a beautiful woman crying

a lost kid dying

an unknown person hiding

and I'm always running away

don't know from who

don't know from what

it's not a monster

I'm way past that

I'm not sure if it is a man

I just know there is a way out

and while I'm running away

I'm looking for the person who has the answer

I always fall

and whatever it is it's going to catch me

I start screaming

crying with this agony

my ankle hurts

I'm wearing a white dress that got dirty when I fell

I'm barefoot and scared

it's comming for me

I scream and then wake up

Neck is sweaty, covers are twisted, tears in my eyes daring to fall, the night is silent and I feel scared.

In the loneliness of my nightmares I can't seem to run to you! cuz you are never there.. :[

love...always...

hope!♥

I Miss You (cliche I know)

ok so apparently I'm not that good as a writer [thank you Luis I appreciate it] so I'm just gonna write and hope it doesn't come out teen and stupid [again thank you Luis]

well if I could just talk to him maybe I would understand, I mean I thought we were like friends or something but the more I think about it the more I seem to think that even though I considered him my friend he probably didn't consider me his.

I do miss him, no matter how much I wish I didn't. I don't think I've ever told anyone what I told him.

I guess he is just one of those people you loose even though you didn't want to, I guess it's just one more punch life will throw.

If I ever see him again I'll stand there and say "I missed you" then I would walk away probably hidding the tears...

I miss you I really do, I just don't know how to deal with this world without you... damn..

love...always

hope!♥

wish you weren't always on my mind
wish I could stop writing about you
wish every song wouldn't remind me of you

wish you could see me wanting you just the way you want her
wish you could see us in a near future
wish you could understand you are my light

if you cry I cry
I you die I'll cry you back to life
if you smile I couldn't be happier
if you shine I'll steal a star and shine for you

wish she would love you just to see you happy
wish she could see how fascinating you are
wish she would notice the way your eyes light up when she is around

wish you could love me
we could be this beautiful, new born miracle
wish to you I wasn't invisible..!

love....always....
hope!♥